I knew it was going to be a lot.
But I don’t think I fully grasped what it would feel like to renovate a home and plan a wedding in the same year. It’s one of those things that sounds ambitious on paper: “Let’s just get it all done!”, until you realise halfway through that you’re basically running two full marathons on completely different terrains, at the same time, with no finish line in sight.
The house reno has been… mentally exhausting.
There’s just so much to think about. From electrical points to ceiling fans, to whether the tiles we chose in March still spark joy in July. Every decision feels oddly high-stakes, because once it’s installed, that’s it. You live with it.
And the delays. The random hiccups. The silent contractors who somehow always reply without actually answering your question. I didn’t realise how draining it would be to constantly have to chase, decide, adjust, rinse, repeat.
The wedding stuff? That’s a whole different kind of emotional.
It’s not just picking dresses or songs. It’s navigating expectations: mine, his, his family’, society’s. It’s figuring out how to create something meaningful, without getting swallowed by Pinterest boards or budget spreadsheets.
It’s the emotional weight of trying to plan a day that’s supposed to reflect our relationship, while sometimes feeling like we’re too damn tired to even talk properly.
What people don’t really tell you…
🟢 That you’ll feel guilty for not being more excited about things that are objectively exciting.
🟢 That you’ll start resenting your own to-do list.
🟢 That you’ll wonder if something’s wrong with you because you’re not feeling as “bridal” or “blessed” as you think you should.
And maybe worst of all .. that you’ll feel like you're constantly dropping the ball somewhere, no matter how much you're doing.
But here’s what I’ve come to understand (and am still reminding myself of, daily):
You’re not behind. You’re not ungrateful. You’re just stretched.
This season is hard, not because you're doing something wrong, but because you're trying to do so much right at once.
So if you're in the same boat, here’s what’s helped me:
🧠 Decision fatigue is real. Give yourself permission to care less about certain things. Not everything needs to be perfect. Some things can just be… “fine”.
💸 Overlapping expenses = overlapping anxiety. Talk about it. Budget together. And don’t be afraid to push non-essential stuff till later. You don't need to prove anything.
🫶 Emotional check-ins matter more than checklist check-offs. Some days we’re ticking off tasks. Other days, we’re just holding space for each other to not fall apart. Both are valid. Both are love.
🛑 And sometimes… I just stop everything. No reno talk. No wedding admin. Just a quiet meal or a mindless scroll. Because my nervous system matters more than my project timeline.
If you’re reading this while feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, or like you just want to tap out for a week.. I see you. I am you.
You’re not doing it wrong. You’re just human. And what you’re building, both your home and your marriage, is worth taking your time for.
Hang in there.