Astrology gave me the language. Life gave me the lesson.
I’m not in a deep, soul-searching chapter right now. I’m in the season of tile samples, wedding spreadsheets, and half-packed boxes. What I’ve learned, through both astrology and lived experience, is that staying soft in the chaos is its own kind of strength.
When life gets loud. I look inward.
I didn’t realise I was moving through a “rites of passage” season, until I started feeling like I needed armour just to function.
Between renovation decisions, wedding logistics, business responsibilities, and being a functioning adult with a fridge to clean and a body to feed, I kept telling myself: “Come on. Just push through.”
And I could. I can power through. That’s the Aries Sun and Rising in me, wired for motion, for action, for don’t-wait-just-do-it energy.
But lately, something in me whispered, “You’re not just building a home or planning a wedding. You’re growing into a version of yourself that needs you to be softer, not harder.”
Astrology helped me name that whisper. To realise that I don’t need to fix this season, I need to feel it.
I move fast but I think in systems.
On the surface, I’m decisive. I don’t spiral over texts. I don’t need to sleep on every little thing. Aries energy doesn’t wait around.
But when it comes to things like optimising my miles strategy, timing the 9.9 sale, or squeezing Shopee vouchers for all they’re worth.. my brain goes into spreadsheet-simulation mode.
That’s the Gemini Moon–Capricorn Stellium combo in full force: I don’t “overplan” because I’m anxious. I plan because I can see the whole map. I genuinely enjoy working the system, strategising outcomes, and squeezing the most value out of every decision.
Still.. even mental mastery has a cost. And I’m learning to ask myself: Is this energising me… or exhausting me? Am I doing this from alignment… or from control?
That pause: that one breath between tabs, is what keeps me tender in a world that keeps asking me to “maximise” everything.
Boundaries are how I stay tender, not distant.
I don’t like wasting time. I’m efficient by nature, Aries doesn’t linger. Capricorn doesn’t entertain what isn’t useful. And my Mars in Aquarius? It’s already five steps ahead.
So when I start feeling emotionally overloaded; like I’m being asked to make one more decision, reply to one more message, troubleshoot one more reno glitch, my instinct is to shut it all down and disappear into logistics.
Because spreadsheets are safe. Cashback calculations don’t get offended. And figuring out how to split a big-ticket item across three cards for maximum miles doesn’t require emotional labour.
But I know myself now. I know when I’m using strategy to avoid discomfort. I know when my boundaries are clean… and when they’re just shields.
So instead of ghosting everything, I practice saying:
✔️“Let’s pause this.”
✔️“I need space to think, not decide.”
✔️“Can we come back to this when I’m not running on 5% battery?”
Every time I protect my nervous system first, I stay closer to the version of me I actually want to bring into the room: honest, engaged, present. That’s not being cold. That’s being clear.
I’m learning to stay present without overriding myself
Living together. Planning a wedding. Renovating a home. These things sound exciting and they are, but they also expose all the fault lines.
How we handle pressure. How we disagree. How we shut down. How we ask (or don’t ask) for support.
With Pluto in my 7th House, my relationships are where the deepest shifts happen. It’s not about surface harmony: it’s about truth. Power dynamics. Emotional honesty.
And sometimes that truth is:
“I don’t want to talk right now.”
“I’m overstimulated, and everything you say feels like a personal attack even though it’s not.”
“I need you, but I don’t want to be touched right now.”
This season has shown me that tenderness doesn’t mean constant openness. It means intentional pacing.
Sometimes love is not forcing the conversation. Sometimes love is letting silence do its work, trusting we’ll return to each other when our nervous systems come back online.
And the more I honour my own rhythm, the more I step away when I’m overwhelmed without guilt, the safer our connection actually becomes.
Not because we’re doing it perfectly, but because we’re both learning to stay, without losing ourselves in the process.
I’m not trying to master this season, just move through it without losing myself
I used to think growth had to look like control. Now I know it often looks like knowing when to stop. When to soften. When to say “I don’t know,” and let that be enough.
Astrology didn’t fix me, but it gave me a framework. It helped me recognise that I’m not “too much” or “not enough.” I’m just wired to lead with fire (Aries), think in spirals and systems (Gemini + Capricorn), and feel what’s unspoken (Pisces 12H, Pluto in 7H) - all at once.
And in this chapter of wedding prep, home-making, and holding space for so many moving pieces, I’m not here to be impressive. I’m here to be whole.
To not rush through a season I’ll never get back. To show up for my partner and our future life together without abandoning my present self. To protect the parts of me that are tender, so they don’t go numb in the name of efficiency.
No big insight. No grand transformation arc.
Just this quiet commitment:
I want to move through this chapter clear-eyed, soft-hearted, and real.
And for now, that’s enough.